So, are you really going to send me back to the childrens home? Aunt Karen said you rushed in, grabbed me because you didnt know a baby was on the way. Im not even yours
Marian was standing at the stove, flipping pancakes. Her husband would be home from work soon and the whole family would sit down for dinner.
She thought, Why is little Sam so quiet in his bedroom today? Usually, when Marian cooks his favourite pancakes, Sam buzzes over, looks right into her eyes and asks,
Mum, can I have another one?
She hands him a pancake, he looks like hes had enough, but before long he waddles back, eyes bright, and stretches each syllable,
Mummmy, can I have one more?
Marian knows Sam isnt actually hungry he just loves hearing that warm, perfect word, Mum. Earlier shed often set the spatula down, scoop him up in her arms hes only five, not that heavy and say, Alright, love, shall we go welcome Daddy from work?
Sam would beam and repeat,
Yes, Mum, lets go meet Daddy! His eyes would sparkle with wonder. Hed never known a mum and dad before, and now he did.
Now Sam has his own room, his own bed, and a little play wall with swings a treat Daddy bought him. He also has toy cars, a robot, a building set and a heap of other toys that are all his and nobody elses. In the evenings, Marian reads him stories, rubs his head and tells him she loves him. Sams heart is so full of that love hes almost forgotten what life was like before.
Marian tried to call Sam, but the little boy suddenly kicked her in the tummy.
She touched his belly and the girl, Poppy, kicked again.
Good Lord, Marian prays every day for this unexpected gift, hoping everything will be alright. Theyve already picked a name for the baby Nick suggested Poppy. Grandpas name is Catherine on the family side.
People kept telling Marian she couldnt have her own children, that she and Nick had taken Sam from the childrens home, and that a year later another baby would arrive. So here we are, a new little girl on the way!
Marian got lost in thought and almost forgot to flip the pancake. She called out,
Sam, sweetheart, why are you so quiet today?
Silence. Was he not hearing?
She turned off the stove and walked into the nursery.
Even the light was off. Where could Sam be?
Then a soft thump came from his room. Marian flicked the switch and saw Sam sitting on the couch, bundled in a jacket and a beanie. He clutched a backpack stuffed full of his favourite toy cars.
What are you doing in the dark? Marian laughed, Come on, get up and get dressed, are you planning a trip? Lets have those pancakes with golden syrup and condensed milk, okay, Sam? Whats gotten into you?
Sam didnt smile. He stared ahead with a faraway look, then asked,
Can I take my toys with me? She wont need any cars.
Sam, what are you saying? Where are you going? Marians hands fell to her sides. Was she a bad mum? Did Sam not feel her love? Maybe he was jealous about a sister arriving? Funny, because just yesterday he was over the moon.
Are you really going to send me back to the childrens home? Aunt Karen said you rushed in, took me, didnt know a baby was on the way. Im not yours
Sams eyes glistened with tears, he barely held himself together.
Sam, what? Which aunt? Marian remembered meeting the neighbour a few days ago, and she started talking about how grateful they were that the baby would be here soon. She stared at Sam, You rushed in, dear, you rushed!
She was sure Sam hadnt understood anything yet. She said goodbye to the nosy neighbour without a fuss, not arguing with Sam. But Sam, as it turned out, had taken it all in.
He suddenly seemed to think he didnt belong, all alone.
Marian scooped him into a hug; at first he pushed her away, then he collapsed into her arms and started crying.
Love, you didnt get it, did you? That aunt knows nothing. Daddy and I love you so much and well never give you away.
She slipped off his jacket and beanie and they sat together, silent, on the couch, holding each other.
When Poppy was born, Sam and Nick were home alone for a while, then they all headed off to see Mum and the new sister.
Sam was nervous, fearing he might not be liked by his little sister.
When he saw how tiny she was, a soft smile spread across his face. Mum, how can someone so little be without an older brother? Ill teach her to play with the cars well have a blast together!
Now Sam never leaves Poppys side, waiting for her to grow, and the parents plan to move her into his room. For now, hes Mums righthand man.
That evening Marian called him, Sam, Ive got Poppy ready, lets go meet Daddy.
Sam was already dressed, standing in the hallway, Mum, Ill hold the door, you bring the cot out!
They took the lift down, stepped out and, just then, the same neighbour walked into the hallway.
Sam squeezed Marians hand a little tighter, as if gathering courage.
Mum, can you help the lady, call the lift? Her bags are heavy.
Right away, love! Sam looked proud, pressed the lift button, and ran after Marian.
Tomorrows a weekend, so the whole family will head to the park. Its a shame Poppys still tiny, but shell grow fast and theyll all ride the rides together. And Sam, as big brother, will hold her tight if she gets scared. After all, theyre brother and sister forever!
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